Start of 2024

It's almost the end of January 2024. And I feel exhausted. Mentally. It's getting more and more exhausting to be in this position where I cannot even have a financial stability. My debts are just never ending. Shit. I really, really need a fund injection where I can star over with my financial situation. But I guess, that's not how it should work. Because, even though I got that kind of fund injection, my habit of spending money without thinking too much of it will creeping back to me.

So, I guess the solution is not fund injection. But a major change on spending money. But, to be honest, I am desperate of a change in my habit. I really want to break the bad habit. WHY CAN'T I STOP SPENDING SO MUCH ON THINGS I DON'T NEED??? WHY???

THIS IS WHY I NEED TO BE HARDER ON MYSELF!!! I need to be in control of my own self. No one will be able to control me other than me! Fuck! Fuck! FUCK!!!